What's On in Newcastle in October


Sunday for Sammy and The Laffalang Gang present A Sketch for Sammy

Sunday 1st October 2017


13:30


14:00



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Sunday for Sammy and The Laffalang Gang present A Sketch for Sammy

Sunday 1st October 2017

Sunday for Sammy and Ion Productions present...
A Sketch for Sammy 2017 featuring the brilliant Laffalang Gang
After two previous full houses, mayhem and rollicking laughter are guaranteed as the Laffalang Gang perform new and tried and tested sketches.
Full line up to follow soon.
Tickets free but limited to four per person via Julieclay@blueyonder.co.uk

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Daniel Sloss – NOW

Sunday 1st October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Daniel Sloss – NOW

Sunday 1st October 2017

LIVE NATION IN ASSOCIATION WITH MZA PRESENTS Daniel Sloss – NOW
NOW is the stunning new show from Scotland’s internationally acclaimed and award-winning stand-up.
Star of TV’s ‘Conan’ (a record seven appearances), to-date Daniel has performed nine sell-out Edinburgh Fringe’s, two solo off-Broadway seasons, released a DVD, given a ‘Tedx’ Talk (aged 19) and tours extensively to rave reviews throughout Australasia, USA, UK and Europe.
NOW, what’s next….?
‘An endearingly unabashed blend of arrogance, awkwardness and self-effacing anecdotes delivered with precision timing, perfectly-placed silence and unfettered confidence… Nothing is off limits… Sloss skilfully weaves sensitive subject matter into a hilarious tapestry of politically incorrect and sexually inappropriate zingers… his humour intelligently and ironically calling out the hypocrisy of human nature.’ ★★★★ Herald Sun, Australia
‘Dirty, sweet and clever’ New York Times
‘Deliciously dark stand-up’ ★★★★ Mail on Sunday
‘Irreverent wit… devastating!’ Advertiser, Australia
‘Brilliantly dark’ Sunday Times
‘Dazzling wit… Unstoppable!’ Telegraph
‘Funny, intelligent and charming’ ★★★★ Edinburgh Evening News
‘Genuinely funny!’ Time Out
‘Sloss is a festival highlight. See him’ ★★★★½ Age, Australia
PLUS SPECIAL GUEST KAI HUMPHRIES
www.danielsloss.com
Twitter: @Daniel_Sloss #NOW
YouTube: GETSLOSSED
Facebook: Daniel-Sloss
Instagram: DanielSloss
CLIP: Daniel Sloss on USA’s Conan O’Brien Show (5th appearance, Feb 2016)

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The Noise Next Door: Uproar!

Monday 2nd October 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Noise Next Door: Uproar!

Monday 2nd October 2017

Witness the astonishing comedy sensation LIVE! The Noise Next Door are causing a commotion with their fourth nationwide tour - an anarchic evening of side-splitting jokes, jaw-dropping characters, and mind-blowing songs. Join the quickest wits in comedy as they transform audience suggestions into a fantastic, fresh new entertainment experience every single night.
As seen on BBC1, BBC3, ITV1 and ITV2!
As heard on BBC Radio 1 and BBC Radio 4!
'Hilarious... A superior kind of chaos' Daily Telegraph
'Immaculately well executed' Times
'Comedy gold' Guardian
'Phenomenal' Daily Mirror
www.thenoisenextdoor.com
Twitter: @NoiseNextDoor
Facebook: / NoiseNextDoor
YouTube: / NoiseNextDoorVideos

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Bright Club

Tuesday 3rd October 2017


19:30


20:30



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Bright Club

Tuesday 3rd October 2017

Bright Club Newcastle is the thinking person's stand up night, blending comedy, music, new writing, research and, performance, into a smorgasbord of delights. Locally sourced Academics from the North East take to the stage performing comic routines centred around their research. Funny and fascinating in equal measure, Bright Club offers a night out unlike any other.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Red Raw

Wednesday 4th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Red Raw

Wednesday 4th October 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With headliner Nico Yearwood .

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The Thursday Show

Thursday 5th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Thursday Show

Thursday 5th October 2017

Start the weekend early with this two hour live comedy show. It features the best comperes, established headliners and several up and coming acts from the local and national circuits. There’s also a slot for a newcomer on every bill. The line-up is also usually the same as our premium Saturday night show but at almost half the price.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Addy Van Der Borgh , Tom Wrigglesworth , Joby Mageen , Paul Marsh and host Susan Morrison .



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The Friday Show

Friday 6th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Friday Show

Friday 6th October 2017

There’s no better way to end the working week than with The Friday Show. Our ace comperes, seasoned headliners and roster of up and coming home grown comedians combine in this two hour live show. There’s five acts on every bill including the very best comics from the UK and beyond.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Addy Van Der Borgh , Tom Wrigglesworth , Joby Mageen , Paul Marsh and host Susan Morrison .


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The Saturday Show

Saturday 7th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Saturday Show

Saturday 7th October 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Addy Van Der Borgh , Tom Wrigglesworth , Joby Mageen , Paul Marsh and host Susan Morrison .




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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 8th October 2017


12:00


12:30



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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 8th October 2017

Kids, do you like watching idiots making fools of themselves?
Parents, sick of the kids staring at screens all day but can't really be bothered to entertain them yourself?
Well, why not come the the Kid's Comedy Club? There's loads of daft stuff going on, there are always a selection of the finest comedians around doing jokes without swears, sometimes there is magic, sometimes improv, sometimes impressions but it is NEVER boring..This show is suitable for children and adults of all ages, (well maybe not babies or really, grumpy old folk). Best suited for 8 to 12 year olds.
Tickets £4 per person.
You can also purchase meals from the kids menu only £4 which we’ll bring to you during the interval - we will keep it healthy, kid friendly and of course we can cater for the fussiest of eaters!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
Approx running time 1hr 30 mins

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Jason Byrne: The Man With Three Brains

Sunday 8th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Jason Byrne: The Man With Three Brains

Sunday 8th October 2017

‘The Man With Three Brains’ is a brand new show from the highly acclaimed and extremely funny, Jason Byrne .
Jason has three brains which kick into action when he hits the stage. His left brain scans the audience and room, looking for improv moments. His right brain collates stand-up material and stunts, poised to dish out the funnies at speed. His centre brain is Jason’s coach, pushing him to the limit.
The fastest thinking comic around will not only trip himself up, but probably you too.
It’s been a busy few years for Byrne. In addition to his extensive touring worldwide, his Radio 2 show was awarded the UK radio industry’s prestigious Sony Radio Gold Award. As well as fronting a brand new studio based comedy chat show Jason Byrne's Snaptastic Show for TV3 in Ireland, he is co-host of Sky’s hugely popular new entertainment programme Wild Things on Sky1.
Also seen on Live at the Apollo (BBC1), The Royal Variety Show (ITV1), The John Bishop Show (BBC1), and Father Figure (BBC1) of which he is creator and star.
'Unmissable' Evening Standard
'Watching a new Jason Byrne show is a bit like witnessing lightning in a botttle' Edinburgh Evening News
'Byrne is consistently brilliant' Metro
'The outright king of live comedy' Times
www.jasonbyrne.ie
Twitter: @theJasonByrne

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Good Grief

Monday 9th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Good Grief

Monday 9th October 2017

Dear Sir/Madam
Good Grief is here! Join us for an evening of comedy from emerging talent and our closest comedy affiliate. We take our comedy fresh and tasty so we're keeping the doors low and the quality high. Expect some stellar acts to drop into the North East for this. Four top acts, one experienced compere and a cracking headliner for 3 diddly squid - lovely stuff!
Yours with a ton of love and really properly decent hand shake.
Good Grief
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Danny Bhoy - Make Something Great Again For Stronger Better Future Tomorrow Together

Tuesday 10th October 2017


19:00


20:00



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Danny Bhoy - Make Something Great Again For Stronger Better Future Tomorrow Together

Tuesday 10th October 2017

Scottish comedian Danny Bhoy embarks on his maiden tour of his brand-new show this autumn in selected theatres throughout the UK. Don’t miss this internationally renowned and critically acclaimed comedian who regularly sells out tours all over the world with his unique brand of observational story telling.
'He creates a remarkable intimacy with his audience. A must see.' The Age, Australia
'His routines have the mark of those which are quoted from for years to come.' The Herald, UK
'This is a show you could see time and time again. Exceptional.' The Sunday Mail, Australia


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Red Raw

Wednesday 11th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Red Raw

Wednesday 11th October 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With headliner Scott Bennett .
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PAUL FOOT: 'TIS A PITY SHE'S A PIGLET

Thursday 12th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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PAUL FOOT: 'TIS A PITY SHE'S A PIGLET

Thursday 12th October 2017

In Paul's first new show in two years, Professor Ketchup and his camembert piglet join forces as he tackles the big issues such as terrorism.
Plus Ant 'n Dec, Immigration X-Factor and breakfast.
The multi-award winning Mr Foot has appeared on numerous TV and Radio programmes including Never Mind The Buzzcocks, Would I Lie To You, 8 Out Of 10 Cats, 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown, If Katie Hopkins Ruled The World, Russell Howard’s Good News and The Infinite Monkey Cage on BBC Radio4.
'Utterly outlandish, but beneath layers of absurdity is Foot’s sharp eye for satire' Time Out
'He’s a comedy whirlwind from the school of Spike Milligan..... It’s risky to call someone unique, but Foot is certainly pretty close.' Three Weeks
'Sublime, original and brilliant' Independent
'Unobtrusively masterful stuff' Scotsman



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Pajama Men - Pterodactyl Nights

Friday 13th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Pajama Men - Pterodactyl Nights

Friday 13th October 2017

Drawing on their huge catalogue of classic bits, always introducing new material and lacing it all together with bizarre improvised tangents the Pajama Men create an anarchic night of jubilant and inventive comedy.
Whether you’ve been watching them for years or are seeing them for the first time, attending one of the Pajama Men’s Pterodactyl Nights will get you where you need gettin’.
‘Without props and costumes, but with expert skill and an impish sense of fun, the Pajama Men create a cartoon of the mind – a shape-shifting world in which anything seems not just possible, but imminent.’ ★★★★★ Guardian
‘One of the most dazzling displays of comedy theatre I’ve ever seen. It’s weird. And it’s wonderful.’ ★★★★★ Times



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ABANDOMAN: LIFE + RHYMES

Friday 13th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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ABANDOMAN: LIFE + RHYMES

Friday 13th October 2017

Show And Tell present
ABANDOMAN : LIFE + RHYMES
The Irish hip-hop comedy freestyle duo take their hit show on tour. Come see the fictional autobiography that entertained over 10,000 people in a sell-out run at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
The year is 1993. After destroying rural Ireland’s talent show circuit, hip-hop improvisers Abandoman are teetering on the edge of international fame. This is their access-all-areas story: the highs, lows and a cast of characters…that changes every night.
This is your chance to be part of Abandoman’s history. Their biggest, most ambitious show ever follows years of touring across the world, and supporting Ed Sheeran on his major UK tour. This is their Life and Rhymes.
Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dNsjYeePl4
‘Raucous, expansive and relentlessly hilarious’ **** Times
‘A truly unique and mind-bending musical comedy experience’ ***** Broadway Baby
‘I’ve yet to see an audience not go nuts’ **** Fest
‘Flight of the Conchords meets 8 Mile… Nothing short of genius’ Chortle
As seen recently on 8 out of 10 Cats Does Countdown, The One Show and Alan Carr’s Happy Hour. As heard on Nick Grimshaw’s BBC Radio 1 show.
www.showandtelluk.com | @show_and_tell | @Abandoman



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Nick Helm: There Is Nothing You Can Do To Me That I Haven't Already Done To Myself - Extra Show!

Saturday 14th October 2017


17:00


18:00



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Nick Helm: There Is Nothing You Can Do To Me That I Haven't Already Done To Myself - Extra Show!

Saturday 14th October 2017

Stop fearing the worst. It’s already happened. So instead of crying about it, why not crawl out of your homemade nuclear fallout shelters and bear witness to Living Legend and National Treasure in waiting Nick Helm as he delivers some home truths about life, love and how not to be a dick.
This is a call to arms to anyone that feels hard done by and short-changed by this ugly new world. It’s time to take ownership and rise from the ashes as we learn to believe in ourselves again. For one night in your pathetic lives, let’s believe in a better world. Let’s believe in Nick Helm.
BAFTA nominated filmmaker and star of BBC3’s Uncle, Heavy Entertainment, C4's Loaded, Live at the Apollo and regular on 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown, Nick Helm sets off on his first national tour in order to bring his unique blend of high octane stand up, music and poetry, in person, to the people.
‘Genuinely exciting’ Telegraph ★★★★★
‘A genuinely unique comedy brain’ Guardian
‘A smorgasbord of delights. Helm is a comic tour de force, and then some’ Mail on Sunday ★★★★
‘A potent mix of soft-voiced fragility and visceral showmanship. An exciting comic presence’ Times
‘A true comedy daredevil. Utterly exhilarating.’ Time Out ★★★★
‘Original and beguiling’ Sunday Times
‘Top tip – the utterly full on Nick Helm’ Evening Standard ★★★★
‘Inspired anarchy’ Scotsman On Sunday
‘A full-on assault on the senses of humour, dignity and pathos’ Chortle ★★★★
‘Leaves the audience on a massive high. This is worth every penny’ British Comedy Guide ★★★★½
‘Very exciting’ Daniel Kitson
‘Blew my mind’ Jimmy Carr

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Nick Helm: There Is Nothing You Can Do To Me That I Haven't Already Done To Myself

Saturday 14th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Nick Helm: There Is Nothing You Can Do To Me That I Haven't Already Done To Myself

Saturday 14th October 2017

Stop fearing the worst. It’s already happened. So instead of crying about it, why not crawl out of your homemade nuclear fallout shelters and bear witness to Living Legend and National Treasure in waiting Nick Helm as he delivers some home truths about life, love and how not to be a dick.
This is a call to arms to anyone that feels hard done by and short-changed by this ugly new world. It’s time to take ownership and rise from the ashes as we learn to believe in ourselves again. For one night in your pathetic lives, let’s believe in a better world. Let’s believe in Nick Helm.
BAFTA nominated filmmaker and star of BBC3’s Uncle, Heavy Entertainment, C4's Loaded, Live at the Apollo and regular on 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown, Nick Helm sets off on his first national tour in order to bring his unique blend of high octane stand up, music and poetry, in person, to the people.
‘Genuinely exciting’ Telegraph ★★★★★
‘A genuinely unique comedy brain’ Guardian
‘A smorgasbord of delights. Helm is a comic tour de force, and then some’ Mail on Sunday ★★★★
‘A potent mix of soft-voiced fragility and visceral showmanship. An exciting comic presence’ Times
‘A true comedy daredevil. Utterly exhilarating.’ Time Out ★★★★
‘Original and beguiling’ Sunday Times
‘Top tip – the utterly full on Nick Helm’ Evening Standard ★★★★
‘Inspired anarchy’ Scotsman On Sunday
‘A full-on assault on the senses of humour, dignity and pathos’ Chortle ★★★★
‘Leaves the audience on a massive high. This is worth every penny’ British Comedy Guide ★★★★½
‘Very exciting’ Daniel Kitson
‘Blew my mind’ Jimmy Carr


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Lee Kyle: A Brilliant Comedy Show By Lee Who Is The Best (Kids Show)

Sunday 15th October 2017


12:00


12:30



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Lee Kyle: A Brilliant Comedy Show By Lee Who Is The Best (Kids Show)

Sunday 15th October 2017

CALL THE BOX OFFICE ON 0191 300 9700 TO BOOK A FAMILY TICKET FOR £16 - COVERS 4 PEOPLE, MUST INCLUDE AT LEAST 1 ADULT
Lee Kyle (the regular host of our monthly kids show) is the best at comedy and anyone who says he isn't is a liar. Mind you, it is him who is typing this.
He's going to do all of his kids comedy and will not swear. Well, he might say boobs but that's about it.
Adults only allowed if they aren't boring, kids only allowed if they don't steal from charity boxes.
No smoking.
Duration - 1 hour.
Best suited for 8-12's. Sorry, no under 5's and all young comedy fans must be accompanied by an adult.

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Which is the Best Podcast: The Much Anticipated 93rd Episode LIVE!

Sunday 15th October 2017


15:00


15:30



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Which is the Best Podcast: The Much Anticipated 93rd Episode LIVE!

Sunday 15th October 2017

Every week Lee Kyle and Sammy Dobson meet and decide 'Which is the Best?' between things of the same or similar names. They aren't that sure why they do it but nobody has stopped them and some people seem to not mind listening to them do it.
For example, is Mince better than Mints? Is it better to be Ostracised or Ostrich Sized?
So, since they do this every week, imagine their surprise when it turned out that this live episode would turn out to be the 93rd they'd ever done! What a landmark! The big 9-3! (Unless they miss a week between now and then which they did once because Sammy went to Berlin).
It was fun last year, so there is no reason to assume it won't be at least 8000 times better this year.


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Ahir Shah: Control

Sunday 15th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Ahir Shah: Control

Sunday 15th October 2017

In an age of global socio-political turmoil, Shah presents a show about freedom, fascism, history, hope, resistance, and milk. Ahir's last show enjoyed packed runs at the Edinburgh Fringe, the Soho Theatre, and a national tour. In it, he theorised that we were being tugged in contradictory directions by a potential brighter future and resurgent worst of the past. He's currently trying to work out how to build that future in a time when the past appears to be winning. He's got loads of jokes about it.

'Burning passion at his fingertips and the gags to back up his fire'***** List '
Excellent' **** Guardian
http://ahirshah.com/
Duration 1 hour


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Seymour Mace’s Magical Shitcakes From Heaven

Sunday 15th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Seymour Mace’s Magical Shitcakes From Heaven

Sunday 15th October 2017

This bit’s called the ‘blurb’ whatever the fuck that means.
Anyway, I’m an idiot and I like being stupid so if that sounds like your kind of thing then get down to Stand Newcastle and laugh at me without feeling bad about it... or don’t... it’s up to you really... I mean, I know I’m not everybody’s cup of tea... anyway, fuck it!
Come, don’t come, whatever. God I’m good at self promotion... please come.
‘Delightfully angry and ridiculously creative’ **** Fest
‘Bananas!’ **** Chortle
***** Times
***** Gigglebeats
**** List


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Shappi Khorsandi: Mistress and Misfit

Monday 16th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Shappi Khorsandi: Mistress and Misfit

Monday 16th October 2017

Shappi presents England's unsung heroine. For too many years she has been known as just ‘Nelson's mistress', a bit of a harlot. (You get ONE job in a brothel and bang goes your reputation.)
Women's lib wasn't a 'thing' in Georgian times, Emma moved mountains to haul herself from 'scullery maid' to 'Lady Hamilton'.
Yes, she occasionally danced on tables naked to get ahead in life, but who hasn't? As a fellow naked dancer on tables, Shappi is inspired by Emma, although she never wants hair big enough to house mice in.


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FIN TAYLOR & KIRI PRITCHARD MCLEAN DOUBLE BILL

Tuesday 17th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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FIN TAYLOR & KIRI PRITCHARD MCLEAN DOUBLE BILL

Tuesday 17th October 2017

FIN TAYLOR : LEFTY TIGHTY RIGHTY LOOSEY
The most talked about comedian from last year’s Fringe is back.
He’s still white, and you’re still hippies. Something’s got to give. And I’m not blacking up.
It’s been a globe-trotting year for Whitey. He’s been to America, Australia, Holland and the rest. And all over he’s found people who say they’re too left-wing to vote for centrists and he’s decided to call bull. A man who is now politically homeless drags you dropouts down into his gutter.
***** Scotsman
***** Chortle
'Thought-provoking and side-splitting' Independent
'The most relevant comedian at the Fringe' EdFestMag
KIRI PRITCHARD MCLEAN : APPROPRIATE ADULT
Award nominated Kiri thinks the world revolves around her but she didn't let that stop her wishing to mentor vulnerable kids. Consequently, she’s going to be extremely careful what she wishes for in future.
An immoral comedian’s morality tale about other people’s lack of morals.
'Passionate, smart and yes, bloody funny, there’s a raw depth of feeling here that you won’t find in many shows.' **** Scotsman
'Raucous and good-humoured without stinting on the protest' Guardian
'A storming hour' **** Skinny
'Never less than fascinating… an hour that’s as funny as it is purposeful.' Chortle



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Red Raw

Wednesday 18th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Red Raw

Wednesday 18th October 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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The Suggestibles

Thursday 19th October 2017


19:30


20:30



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The Suggestibles

Thursday 19th October 2017

You supply the Suggestions. They supply the laughs!
If you like Whose Line is it Anyway? you’ll LOVE the Suggestibles’ two-hour improv comedy joyride! Their show is a speeding rollercoaster of improv games, skits, sketches and songs – including ‘Aspects Of …’ their ingenious improvised musical in the second half. The team is boldly theatrical, wildly irreverent and utterly hilarious.
The whole night is based on audience suggestions, so come armed with ideas as their favourite suggestion of the night wins two free tickets to another Suggestibles show at the Stand. The Suggestibles play here the third Thursday of every month (December varies).
Off-the-cuff, off-the-wall and every show a one-off.
Find more on the Suggestibles at thesuggestibles.com and on Facebook and Twitter
@suggestibles
‘One of the hottest comedy tickets in the North East’ Guardian
‘The best thing to happen to hilarity since the advent of the laugh’ NARC
‘There’s nothing more satisfying than comedy which makes you ache with laughter – and The Suggestibles provide exactly that. It seems there’s no end to their talents’ Journal
‘Undoubtedly one of the greatest acts in the region’ NUS Courier
‘Two hours of comedy gold’ Shields Gazette
‘Something of a phenomenon’ The Crack
NB Concession prices are also available to Actors Equity cardholders for Suggestibles’ shows.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Fred MacAulay - LIVE

Friday 20th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Fred MacAulay - LIVE

Friday 20th October 2017

Scotland is on the brink of a second referendum.
Britain is leaving Europe. Brexit is a reality.
These are the only two known facts in the word of politics. The rest is up to Trump and Putin. So we might as well have a laugh.
Stand up comedian, Fred MacAulay has been entertaining audiences throughout the UK and further afield for nearly 30 years, yet still has the verve and youthfulness of someone ten years his junior….how does he do that??
Fred let’s us into his secret “I use a publicity photo that was taken ten years ago. Now it’s not a secret anymore”
None of this is true. In an era of fake news I thought I’d try some fake publicity.
This will be Fred’s only autumn date in 2017 after his 29th Edinburgh Fringe. And that IS TRUE.


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Paul Sinha: Shout Out to My Ex

Friday 20th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Paul Sinha: Shout Out to My Ex

Friday 20th October 2017

Paul Sinha is delighted to return to The Stand, Newcastle to perform his latest solo show, Shout Out to My Ex.
In his 2015 Edinburgh Fringe show, the stand-up comedian and doyen of daytime, weaved an intricate tale of happiness based on a combination of doing the two jobs he loved, enjoying parental approval, and, actually being in a proper, grown-up, long-term relationship. The day after he returned home from Edinburgh, the illusion of happiness was shattered. Was this the end? The beginning of the end? Or the end of a beginning?
‘Life will bring him crashing down to earth soon enough. And that really ought to sustain his densely funny and accomplished comedy.’ Scotsman 2015
‘One of those comedians who makes you realise the power of stand-up comedy and the respect it deserves as an art form.’ Yorkshire Post
‘This is what a good stand-up should be. Hilariously funny, passionate and articulate.’ Chortle
Paul has written and performed his own series on Radio 4, is a frequent guest on 5 Live’s Fighting Talk and is the Chaser, known as The Sinnerman, on ITV’s The Chase.
www.paulsinha.com
@paulsinha

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Gavin Webster: It's About Time We Had More Women in There

Saturday 21st October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Gavin Webster: It's About Time We Had More Women in There

Saturday 21st October 2017

My struggle with right on politics.
Gavin Webster is 47 and is white and male and still has trouble getting to grips with ongoing political correctness.
I know, he should be executed!
He started work on a building site in the mid 1980s after attending the comprehensive school with the lowest attainment in the borough of Gateshead.
Apparently he doesn’t realise how lucky and privileged he was.
Expect pertinent and vacuous points from both sides by a man arguing with his inner self.
‘His rants are wonderfully surreal' Herald


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Matt Richardson / Slash

Saturday 21st October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Matt Richardson / Slash

Saturday 21st October 2017

A lot has happened to Matt Richardson since his last tour in 2013. A lot of it is quite strange. Most comedians hope to win accolades and make people laugh, very few end up with Heat Magazine’s Weird Crush trophy.
From interviewing millionaire dogs in LA, ghost hunting with Craig Revel Horwood and having his phone nicked by Kate Moss - it’s been an odd, but fun, few years.
Now Matt can finally tell people about it, as well as talking about everything else on his mind.
‘High wattage charisma’ Guardian from the ‘hilarious and charming’ Mirror host of Virgin Radio's Drive-time show, The Xtra Factor and Celebrity Haunted Hotel Live!



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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 22nd October 2017


12:00


12:30



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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 22nd October 2017

Kids, do you like watching idiots making fools of themselves?
Parents, sick of the kids staring at screens all day but can't really be bothered to entertain them yourself?
Well, why not come the the Kid's Comedy Club? There's loads of daft stuff going on, there are always a selection of the finest comedians around doing jokes without swears, sometimes there is magic, sometimes improv, sometimes impressions but it is NEVER boring..
This show is suitable for children and adults of all ages, (well maybe not babies or really, grumpy old folk). Best suited for 8 to 12 year olds.
You can also purchase meals from the kids menu only £4 which we’ll bring to you during the interval - we will keep it healthy, kid friendly and of course we can cater for the fussiest of eaters!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
Approx running time 1hr

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NO SUCH THING AS A FISH - THE 2017 TOUR - 4.30 Extra Show

Sunday 22nd October 2017


16:00


16:30



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NO SUCH THING AS A FISH - THE 2017 TOUR - 4.30 Extra Show

Sunday 22nd October 2017

Join Dan Schreiber , Andrew Hunter Murray , Anna Ptaszynski and James Harkin on the first leg of their brand new UK tour as they serve up their pick of the most bizarre, extraordinary and hilarious facts known to man.
The award-winning podcast No Such Thing As A Fish gets 1.2 million downloads a week, has been transformed into the spin-off topical BBC2 TV series No Such Thing As The News and was named one of iTunes’s top ten most downloaded podcasts of 2016.
'Knowledge-packed and riotously funny' Times
‘This intelligent quartet serve as a welcome reminder that comedy does not have to be dumb’ Evening Standard


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NO SUCH THING AS A FISH - THE 2017 TOUR - 8pm show

Sunday 22nd October 2017


19:00


20:00



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NO SUCH THING AS A FISH - THE 2017 TOUR - 8pm show

Sunday 22nd October 2017

SORRY, SOLD OUT! If there are any uncollected tickets they will go back on sale on the door 15 mins before the show starts. Please note that it will be standing room only by this point.
Join Dan Schreiber , Andrew Hunter Murray , Anna Ptaszynski and James Harkin on the first leg of their brand new UK tour as they serve up their pick of the most bizarre, extraordinary and hilarious facts known to man.
The award-winning podcast No Such Thing As A Fish gets 1.2 million downloads a week, has been transformed into the spin-off topical BBC2 TV series No Such Thing As The News and was named one of iTunes’s top ten most downloaded podcasts of 2016.
'Knowledge-packed and riotously funny' Times
‘This intelligent quartet serve as a welcome reminder that comedy does not have to be dumb’ Evening Standard




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Felicity Ward - 50% More Likely To Die

Monday 23rd October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Felicity Ward - 50% More Likely To Die

Monday 23rd October 2017

As seen on Josh, Russell Howard's Good News, and The John Bishop Show.
Last year, Felicity wrote a show about mental illness and irritable bowel syndrome.
Much to her surprise, more people saw it than her immediate family and a guy called Gavin.
Always one to flog a dead horse, she has written another one about mental illness, well that, and losing her bag on the bus.
From suicidal construction workers to the fury of public swimming pools, 50% More Likely To Die is the next installation in the exploration of mental health, losing everything and letting go of control.
'A killer show… tremendous… unrelenting… so beautifully woven together…she’s so bloody funny' ★★★★★ List
'This show is just the best I have seen... and then some. Kill for a ticket!” ★★★★★ One4Review
'Her strongest show yet' ★★★★ Sunday Times
'A lot of fun… the audience adore her who are helpless with laughter… a show with heart… leaves her audience buzzing with excitement' ★★★★ Scotsman
'A meandering and masterfully-crafted monologue… brilliantly paced, gloriously funny… she has the audience in her acid wash jeans pocket from the off… a heart-warming show' ★★★★ Herald
'Daft, vivacious… … one of the most ridiculously funniest moments you’ll ever hope to see… Ward delivers another barnstormer of a show' ★★★★ Chortle
'There is no denying that Ward has phenomenal energy as well as storytelling skill… commentating hilariously on her own absurdity' ★★★★ Beyond the Joke
'Felicity Ward is rocking Edinburgh again… one of the finest stand-ups dashing across comedy stages today' ★★★★ Fest Mag
'An engaging, quick-fire delivery that leaves the audience laughing every time…an extremely funny one-woman show that is worth seeing if you have the chance' ★★★★ Ed Fest Mag
'Anxiety has never been this funny' ★★★★ Three Weeks
'One hell of a show… splendidly silly' ★★★★ Edinburgh Reporter

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Red Raw

Wednesday 25th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Red Raw

Wednesday 25th October 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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LEE NELSON - SERIOUS JOKER

Thursday 26th October 2017


19:00


20:00



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LEE NELSON - SERIOUS JOKER

Thursday 26th October 2017

Due to huge demand, Lee’s brand-new, best ever stand-up show has been extended into autumn 2017. You’ve seen him sneaking into places he shouldn’t be, now come and see him where he most definitely should be: live on stage with his sensational Serious Joker Tour.
All profits from the show will be going to Lee.
'YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF' Sepp Blatter
'GET HIM OUT!' Donald Trump
'YOU'VE GOT FOUR YESSES. WELL DONE' Simon Cowell
'COMEDY LEGEND' Sun
'COMEDY GENIUS' Mirror



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Alex Love: How to Win a Pub Quiz

Friday 27th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Alex Love: How to Win a Pub Quiz

Friday 27th October 2017

This highly interactive show is part stand-up, part actual pub quiz. Expand your trivia, compete against other teams, witness results over 60 minutes.
Following packed and sell-out Edinburgh Fringe runs for four years, prepare for facts, niche-referenced nonsense, and prizes as How To Win a Pub Quiz comes to The Stand, Newcastle!

‘That the energy and humour are maintained throughout is testament to Love's ability to work an audience. A brilliantly fun show packed full of running gags and ad-libs’ DenofGeek.com
'It takes quite a show to create such a sense of engagement that one music question can become a full-blown sing-along’ BroadwayBaby.com
@ThisAlexLove



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TOM STADE: I SWEAR

Friday 27th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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TOM STADE: I SWEAR

Friday 27th October 2017

Blue Jeans Management Proudly Presents
TOM STADE : I SWEAR
After a hiatus from the touring scene, get ready for another epic blast of Tom Stade! Direct from the Edinburgh Festival, the Canadian tour-de-force is back with a brand-new show for 2017.
Renowned for his carefree attitude and broad-minded vision, nothing is taboo to this enlightened and captivating comedy legend. Combining off-the-scale charm, razor-sharp wit and a no-holds-barred attitude; Tom pledges to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
As seen on BBC One’s Live at the Apollo, Michael McIntyre’s Comedy Roadshow, The John Bishop Show and Ch4’s Comedy Gala.
Kick back and enter the awesome and mischievous world of Tom Stade as he provides an inspiring and incisive antidote to these dark and uncertain times. Simply sublime comedy…I SWEAR.
'UNMISSABLE' Edinburgh Evening News
'EVERY INCH A STAR. IF COMEDY IS THE NEW ROCK AND ROLL, THEN TOM STADE IS KEITH RICHARDS' Daily Record
'COMEDY GREATNESS…MONUMENTAL' Metro
'HUGE PRESENCE…REALLY KNOWS HOW TO WORK A ROOM…ATTITUDE AND ENERGY…PROPERLY HILARIOUS, THOROUGHLY ENJOYABLE' Mirror
'ROCK 'n' ROLL COMEDIAN. ABSOLUTELY BOXFRESH; NOTHING IS STAID ABOUT STADE' Evening Standard
'STAND-UP ELITE' Chortle
'SO COOL HE COULD WELL BE THE ANSWER TO GLOBAL WARMING. GLORIOUSLY FUNNY' Scotsman


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MAE MARTIN: DOPE

Saturday 28th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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MAE MARTIN: DOPE

Saturday 28th October 2017

Show And Tell present...
The award winning stand-up and star of BBC Radio Four’s Mae Martin’s Guide to 21st Century Sexuality presents her debut UK tour. Mae Martin is comedy’s most naturally charismatic young storyteller, fresh from sell-out seasons in Australia, Edinburgh and London.
In her new show Dope, she examines a lifetime of obsessions, fandom and addiction and shines a light on that one weird shrimp we all have in our brains that is happy to pursue short-term pleasure despite long-term consequences.
As seen on BBC3’s Russell Howard’s Good News, BBC2’s Live From The BBC, Comedy Central and more. As heard on BBC Radio Four’s The Now Show, as well as her own award-nominated series in 2016.
‘Effortlessly amusing – Mae’s gentle charm is highly watchable’ **** Times
‘Quietly radical - expertly splices comedy, opinion and enlightenment’ Guardian
‘An intelligent bag of cartoonish energy’ ***** Mirror
‘She has mass appeal, is interesting, hugely likeable, and above all else is very funny’ **** Chortle
‘Infectious laughs – deftly delivered’ **** Evening Standard
@TheMaeMartin
@show_and_tell

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Jason Byrne: The Man With Three Brains

Saturday 28th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Jason Byrne: The Man With Three Brains

Saturday 28th October 2017

‘The Man With Three Brains’ is a brand new show from the highly acclaimed and extremely funny, Jason Byrne .
Jason has three brains which kick into action when he hits the stage. His left brain scans the audience and room, looking for improv moments. His right brain collates stand-up material and stunts, poised to dish out the funnies at speed. His centre brain is Jason’s coach, pushing him to the limit.
The fastest thinking comic around will not only trip himself up, but probably you too.
It’s been a busy few years for Byrne. In addition to his extensive touring worldwide, his Radio 2 show was awarded the UK radio industry’s prestigious Sony Radio Gold Award. As well as fronting a brand new studio based comedy chat show Jason Byrne's Snaptastic Show for TV3 in Ireland, he is co-host of Sky’s hugely popular new entertainment programme Wild Things on Sky1.
Also seen on Live at the Apollo (BBC1), The Royal Variety Show (ITV1), The John Bishop Show (BBC1), and Father Figure (BBC1) of which he is creator and star.
'Unmissable' Evening Standard
'Watching a new Jason Byrne show is a bit like witnessing lightning in a botttle' Edinburgh Evening News
'Byrne is consistently brilliant' Metro
'The outright king of live comedy' Times
www.jasonbyrne.ie
Twitter: @theJasonByrne

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Nicola Mantalious Lovett & Joby Mageen - Fruit Salad (Kids Show)

Sunday 29th October 2017


12:00


12:30



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Nicola Mantalious Lovett & Joby Mageen - Fruit Salad (Kids Show)

Sunday 29th October 2017

Join Nicola (the strongest woman in the world) and Joby (the cutest little musical bean - sometimes known as Kong) as they present "FRUIT SALAD" a fun and exciting show for all the family.
It's a mixture of comedy, stories, games, challenges, mess and other stuff.
Best suited for 8-12's. Sorry, no under 5's and all young comedy fans must be accompanied.

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Lloyd Griffith - in:Undated

Sunday 29th October 2017


17:30


18:30



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Lloyd Griffith - in:Undated

Sunday 29th October 2017

inundated: VERB [with object]
1) To overwhelm (someone) with things or people to be dealt with
E.g. ‘Online dating is inundated with vacuous superficial people looking for meaningless interactions based on a photo where you have to look hot, with no substance’
2) Flood
E.g. 'A man crying his eyes out'
Fresh from supporting Jack Whitehall and Rob Beckett on tour, Lloyd embarks on his first nationwide tour in:Undated. A show about overcoming the overwhelming.
Star of BBC’s Taxi To Training, Drunk History (Comedy Central), SoccerAM (Sky Sports 1), The Premier League Show (BBC 2), and Football Republic’s Every Premier League Football Fan in 90 seconds.
‘Disarmingly good’ Times
‘Punchy gags and jaw-dropping voice’ Evening Standard


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Ed Gamble: Mammoth

Sunday 29th October 2017


20:00


21:00



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Ed Gamble: Mammoth

Sunday 29th October 2017

After the huge success of his 2016 tour, that gobby little toerag Ed Gamble is back with a brand new lumbering beast of a comedy show.
Off of Mock the Week (BBC2), Drunk History (Comedy Central), Conan (TBS), Almost Royal (E4), Russell Howard’s Stand Up Central (Comedy Central), Edinburgh Comedy Fest Live (BBC3), Man Down (C4) as well as countless other things (3 other things).
'… He is on irresistible form' ★★★★ Telegraph
'… a master of unlocking the humour in everything' ★★★★ List
'Creative and clever humour that leaves the audience in stitches' ★★★★ Edinburgh Festivals Magazine



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Ben Van Der Velde: Sidekick

Monday 30th October 2017


19:00


20:30



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Ben Van Der Velde: Sidekick

Monday 30th October 2017

Some people are life's heroes: leading men and women full of swash, buckle and daring-do. Others just hold their jackets. As the credits roll and the heroes hump, join Ben off-camera as he salutes the Barney Rubbles, Boo-Boos and Dr Watsons of the world.
Over the past few years, Ben has spread joy and nonsense to all four corners of the British Isles, as well as Greece, Estonia, Switzerland, Latvia, Finland and Norway. On top of that, he has taken commissions to perform a voodoo re-marriage ceremony, founded the Church of the Holy Kazoo with comedy legend Mark Thomas, walked the entire London Underground network and even took part in experiments at The Royal Society that revealed him to have the most infectious laugh of any human, rat or monkey. Join him for an evening of stuff, nonsense and magically riffed tomfoolery.
'Sharp and crafty gagsmith.' Chortle
'Highly promising…an accomplished comic.' Time Out
'Wonderfully improvised riffs showcasing his impressive spontaneity and sharp tongue.' Edinburgh Festivals Magazine
'He displays a crackling, spontaneous energy in which we're swept up.' Fest
Top 50 Jokes of the Fringe 2016 (Scotsman, Huffington Post, iNews)
Worst Foot Forward Podcast
https://soundcloud.com/user-132731264
https://itunes.apple.com/ie/podcast/worst-foot-forward/id1182008770
http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/worst-foot-forward
Be a legend: give us a listen and a (cough 5-star, cough) review.

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THE FOOTBAAAALL SHOW

Tuesday 31st October 2017


19:00


20:30



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THE FOOTBAAAALL SHOW

Tuesday 31st October 2017

Join Gavin Webster and Lee Kyle for the only topical north east football comedy show. Expect local lampooning of the regions clubs, great football nostalgia and anecdotes, a quiz where you can challenge the lads for money on their historical knowledge of Newcastle United, pies and bovril in the break, even a sing song at the end. With great guests including a couple of ex footballing legends. Howay the lads (and lasses)!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran


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