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TALKS BALLS One Night Only! August 11th Click Here to Book Tickets Now!	Download Hi-Resolution image (325KB)

Venue:      Stand 3 Dates:       11th August Time:         20:00 Tickets:     £10 Sorry Sold Out! returns may be available on the door at 7.45pm

SORRY SOLD OUT! There may be returns on the door 15 minutes before the start of the show The legendary Scottish nearly-man of fitba' celebrates fifty years of high expectations, major disappointments and low achievements...

For Bob Doolally, August is not only Fringe time in Edinburgh; it's football time throughout the UK as the beautiful game is reborn after its summer break. It seems that no sooner has one football season ended than the next one has begun. For one night only Bob comes to The Stand to pass on the wealth of wisdom he has nearly picked up over the last fifty years.

The 2007/8 season was one of high hopes and ultimate heartbreak for the Tartan Army. Where Scotland came within a hair's breadth of qualification for Euro 2008, but which ended in heroic failure; where a last-minute Italian winner at Hampden left a nation on its knees with little to look forward to and nothing to celebrate. For four whole days. Until England lost to Croatia and failed to qualify too. Somehow things brightened up after that. For once, we had a major tournament where English fans found out how it feels to be Scottish.

Bob looks back on a year when 100,000 Rangers fans descended on Manchester, just to watch the EUFA cup final on telly, and where Manchester United and Chelsea supporters took the long journey to Moscow for the big final showdown with that most formidable opponent, the Russian police.

Bob reviews all these momentous events, but also looks forward to the 2008-2009 season, for which he has characteristically off-the-wall predictions.

Bob Doolally Talks Balls is also a celebration of 50 years in the game. 1958 saw Doolally as a callow youth leaving national service to start a career which saw him crowned 'the nearly man of Scottish football.'

- The man who nearly opened a pub with George Best
- The man who nearly took to the pitch in the 1968 European cup final - The man who nearly bought Gretna FC

Bob looks back on this glorious career, on his role in Argentina 1978 thirty years on, and also his three-point plan to help Scotland's players return to the old glory days:
 
Ban junk food in schools. Feed it to footballers instead. All the truly great Scottish teams of the past had at least one fat bloke with no teeth playing in an entirely inappropriate position.

Crack down on drugs. Unless we can get our players back onto alcohol we will never stand a chance. The soccer legends of the 1960's and 70's only resorted to drugs when they were too pissed to stand up. But most had enough stamina to go on the piss for days on end without chemical enhancement.
Don't bother with 3-point plans when 2-point plans will do.

After six sell-out Fringe shows at The Stand Comedy Club, Scottish footballing legend Bob Doolally performs at this year's festival for one night only.

As ever, the night will be interspersed with Bob's unique blend of off-colour remarks and politically incorrect humour, banter with the punters and Bob's famous question and answer session. Any question may be asked. Any answer will be given.

Bob Doolally was a regular performer on BBC Scotland's BAFTA-nominated "Live Floor Show” and on the follow-up series "Floor Show”. He was a special guest at the 2005 Irish PFA Awards, and is a regular contributor to Edinburgh Talk Radio station Talk 107.

Click here to book tickets now!

Press Quotes

'Deserves to be a national treasure'
Daily Record

'Almost better than football'
The Independent

'All the skill and precision of a Beckham free kick'
The Stage

'A legend in his own liquid lunchtime'
Cyprus Mail